The unrelated works of blacktiewhitetie.

Kinda long, but it was suppose to mimic a real conversation.

Both characters, Else and Ookame are males, but Ookame is the senior here, both in rank and age. Both of them are members of the Moderators, a law enforcement group made up of 9 members.

the Moderators just had dinner together and seven of them became drunk. Ookame pulls Else(who isn't drunk) to drink with him.

Ookame is a shadowy and mysterious character who doesn't believe in disclosing any information about himself to the rest of the Moderators. He's cunning, racist but a brilliant strategist. this conversation sees Ookame slowly unravel his history.

Please read and comment. Thanks

Else: Now, now, Sennpai.

Ookame: You know, the purest reason I hate the floating world is because it cannot make me completely hate it! The floating world, the geishas! I hate all of them but I pity their damnation! I can never bring myself to be apathetic about it!

Else: Apathetic?

Ookame: Let me tell you my story, I want to tell someone everything. I should shouldn’t I? All these years I kept it so tight lip but I always wanted to tell someone about it.

Else: Please.

Ookame: Don’t you dare interrupt me./ I was born into the floating world but I didn’t belong there- I was a boy after all. But I was told a long long time ago males would have been okay--- Why should I care? The okamisan tried to abort me before but it didn’t work. They said I clung onto that disgusting flit like a little bastard. When I was born, they tried to suffocate me, but I was crying already. The neighbours heard the cries and knocked on the doors and they knew they couldn’t hide me any more. I was let to live but really, it didn’t matter to me if they killed me in the first place. As soon as I could walk and understand Japanese, I was sent to work around the house. I worked with the tamagos. One of them was like me and she treated me quite well but either than that, life was hell. We were fed scraps and given virtually nothing. I remember my clothes were oversized and fray/ the girls didn’t even have enough to own their own underwear, let alone brassieres.

Else: What about your mother/ Did your mother try to support you?

Ookame: She probably wished I was never born. She tried to avoid me anyway. I remember once she bought me to the market to meet a man, my father I suppose, and she wanted him to take me away and raise me up.

Else: And he refused?

Ookame: He said I was too small to be his son. I was so skinny and tiny then! (laughs) I must have been six, but I looked as if I was four! He accused her of lying and they got into a terrible argument. I ran away and one of the maikos found me and brought me back. The next morning, I heard my mother sing that song for the first time.

Else: The one about the river.

Ookame: (drinks) I don’t blame her for wanting to send me away. Life was tough then, both for me and her. But my real father didn’t want me. I bet he was a rich bastard but he refused any responsibility. I know my mother tried repeatedly to persuade him and when I grew older, I begun to represent him here and there and he couldn’t deny it any more. He came by the house and had this huge roll with my mother. I was working, but I could here them shouting. I don’t remember what he said but my mother said, “Well, I don’t need your money; but I certainly don’t want your child either!” He slapped her and that was the end of it. I never saw him again./ Good riddance!

Else: …

Ookame: My mother never mentioned about him again and she refused to talk to me for a few weeks. One night she came back and tried to strangle me with a friend. I slept through it.

Else: You can’t be serious!

Ookame: She was ready to stab me with her hairpin but her friend stopped her. Can you believe it?! My mother wanted me dead! (laughs) Anyway, they had a huge roll that woke me up. I shouted at them to keep quiet and went back to sleep. It was only the next morning did a maiko serving under her friend told me about the night’s events.

Else: Tragic, tragic.

Ookame: But that was then I knew I had to get out of the hellhole. I made up my mind I was going to escape but I knew it was plain crazy because no one had done it before. I used to hide myself after work to cry. (smiles) I was a hopeless kid. One of the geishas found me and I guessed she sympathized with me and she tried to console me. She taught me a few things about the world but I think she was too nice for the floating world--- She escaped with a poor lover many years later, I remember. Bless her. --- I remember very clearly her voice saying that the world was a game with a fixed set of rules. People are split into two groups, winners and losers. Only when you beat the system can you make the rules; as long as you’re a loser, you play by the rules. You can’t go against it, going with it was the only way out. I was nine or ten then, but I understood what she meant. I made a promise to myself and I didn’t look back. You know, they say the old geishas have built a layer of impenetrable armor around them and once a geisha has decided to do that, there’s no turning back. It was the same for me.

Else: No turning back…

Ookame: You know the saddest choice of a geisha’s life is whether to be a wonderful person in the floating world or a wonderful person in real life. (sobs softly) I wasn’t meant to be one, but it’s as if I’ve become one. I don’t have any friends, I don’t trust anybody but myself. I don’t want people to know me; but at the same time I want people to understand me.

Else: There, there Sennpai.

Ookame: My life has been really hard, you know? I’ve always been oppressed and bullied! You wouldn’t have stood one day in my shoes! You’ll probably have killed yourself! (laughs bitterly) You youngsters—fools! ---say forgiving is better than bearing the grudge but that’s because you don’t know what hate is! It’s not easy to continue hating someone you know? Oh, hate… I’ve always hated people in my life, and even though most of them are already dead, I still hate them; I still want to kill them with my own hands!

Else: That’s true.

Ookame: Eh?

Else: You can’t understand someone unless you share their pain.

Ookame: Have you hated anyone in your life?

Else: (smiles) No, at least not like how you do.

Ookame: Coward.

Else: (smiles) That’s just me.

Ookame: (grunts) I left the house when I was 15 for Kyoto. I just thought I had nothing to do with the place ever again--- I was old enough to get a job so I didn’t really need them any more. I had planned the trip months before and that morning when I left, it was very surreal. The okamisen saw me leaving with my belongings but she didn’t say anything. I left a letter behind but I didn’t bid anyone goodbye. I didn’t hear from them again, I don’t think my departure made any difference to them. That period was the best time in my life! I was on my own in a whole new place! Kyoto was very exciting to me and I did odd jobs to get by. I enjoyed a few casual flings with some girls and older women here and there but I was especially wary of women because of where I came from. I lived with a group of other youths in a small house and when we saved enough, we started a small business of delivering goods around the district. It was enough really, and we soon earned the respect of the townspeople In fact, we were so successful that one of the richest man in town even offered to marry his daughter to one of us. By that time I was in my 20s. I decided to leave the business for that lucky friend who was hitched. Besides, Tokyo was staring to modernize and I wanted to seek my fortunes there.

Else: Those were the days of Swing wasn’t it?

Ookame: I was naïve/ It wasn’t a thing like Kyoto but I couldn’t just return. I didn’t know anyone and money was a constant worry. Tokyo was and is expensive. I got involved with the yazukas--- they were the only Japanese business I could identify with and I was fascinated by their apparent obedience to bushido. The first year was okay but it became increasingly delusional, especially with the emergence of biker gangs. I hated the system, I hated the people, but I couldn’t just quit like that---I’d been killed.

Else: Yes, you were involved with the yazukas.


Continue reading the next post

Ookame: I remember--- I can’t seem to forget it--- there was once this biker kid got into a nasty fight with one us and he wasn’t to pay up.

Else: Pay up?

Ookame: He lost the fight. It was either that or we hold him ransom. Either way, we still got the money.

Else: Ah.

Ookame: He called his girlfriend but she didn’t have enough either. He offered for an exchange in ransom there and then; he offered us to gang rape his girlfriend---

Else: Good grief!

Ookame: Without asking her consent! (smashes his glass down onto the table)

Else: No no, please stop it!

Ookame: The thing that completely unnerved me was that our leader agreed! I completely couldn’t believe it even till now!

Else: Did they do it?

Ookame: I wasn’t there. /They did. I left an anonymous voice mail in her biker gang’s leader’s phone to claim responsibility. I knew I was dead.

Else: Dead?

Ookame: I betrayed them. There was a huge confrontation between the gangs. Lots of blood, the law enforcement came but they could only barricade us.(shakes his head) They tried to stop the fight, but it only ended when they used magic. Later, they traced the voice message back to me and I knew I was a goner. (drinks) I was prepared an hour before. I sat in my room--- I had an one room apartment--- I left the door ajar and just sat there watching the time go past and listening to the drops of rains against the windows. I thought of everything I went through but I couldn’t look back. When they didn’t come when I expected them to, I went down to get a drink and finished it in a nearby alley. They were looking for me then, and when I saw them, I shouted at them to come over. I really didn’t care if I was going to die.

Else: They beat you up?

Ookame: (laughs) Really badly. And in the rain at that! It didn’t hurt that much really--- nothing hurts much when you’re already dead. I was immune to pain in a way too. They probably thought I was a demon because I didn’t moan or beg or anything like that. I was… just a mannequin. They probably would have compared it to having sex with a corpse. They let me off and I was left alone in the rain. (sobs) I just laid there. I wasn’t unconscious, I was dead--- inside. Then quite suddenly, I thought about the whole notion about winners and losers and I started crying, I didn’t know why. I propped myself up against the wall and just sat there in the rain.

Else: Then they came?

Ookame: It felt like forever. It was a head hunter/ He used the name Oshima. I knew him of course; most head-hunted people know their head hunters. Anyway, his head popped out from the opening of the alley and he said, “Is the stray wolf here?” At first I didn’t recognise him because it was so dark and I was so wasted. I didn’t answer and he walked in. “Did the wolf lose a fight?”, he asked. Still I did not answer him. He bent down and grabbed me by the hair and lifted my face to face him. “Are you dead?” “Yes,” I replied. “Do you want to die, for real?”, he asked. “Yes,” I told him, “Hurry up and finish me off.” He glared at me, asking if I wanted revenge. I told him I wanted to die. He slammed his forehead against mine and repeated his question, “Do you want revenge?” he asked. I told him yes. “Well,” he said--- I still remember those moments even now--- “You’re going to have decide between either dying for real or having revenge; because you can only have one.”

Else: That’s a very well crafted line.

Ookame: (smiles to himself) That was like a turning point in my life, like an enlightenment; It was like being struck by a lightning bolt. I shouted like I had never shouted before in the dark alley that I wanted revenge./ I could feel my blood boil under the rain! But in truth, I was a loser, but now I had a new purpose in life. It was revenge. Revenge, revenge, revenge!(toasts to an imaginary person)

Else: Well, how did the head hunter offer you the job?

Ookame: He waited for me to calm down and I wanted to leave but he stopped me. He popped the question then but he didn’t say it was for the Moderators. He just asked me if I minded working overseas and with non- Japanese peers. I said no to both questions but I didn’t take him seriously. He hadn’t revealed his identity then and I knew him as the guy who lived two rooms away who worked as an office person. That was when he asked if I was interested in working for the Assassination Team and he revealed his true identity. I remember when he said that, his voice changed, and the look of his face changed, although I can’t exactly remember how. “I’m not Oshima your neighbour, Shirou, I’m a head hunter sent by the Assassination Team to head hunt you. We want you to work for us. The question now is do you want to?”(laughs) It was quite a shock. When he added I would have to leave Tokyo, I cried out of happiness. I left Tokyo that very night and that’s the way it has been ever since.

(Ookame has finished half a bottle. He stops drinking and Else takes this opportunity)

Else: Let’s leave Sennpai, you’ve had too much.

Ookame: There’s half a bottle left.

Else: Your liver is going to suffer.

Ookame: I’m not done. Coming to the Moderators is another thing./ It’s another long story.

Else: Now Ookame---

Ookame: DO YOU WANT TO LISTEN!

Else: (startled) If you wish to Sennpai. I don’t want you to get emotional

(Ookame pours himself another glass. He starts crying. Else sighs and tries to console Ookame.)

Ookame: I came into the Moderators filled with hope. I thought it was going to be like that time in Kyoto. I wasn’t racist then. True, I was a little nationalistic due to my stay in Kyoto but I certainly didn’t hate foreigners. The thing is the old Moderators made me HATE them, the non-Asians! It’s not my fault, IT’S NOT MY FAULT! (thumps the table and begins to cry harder.) Else, do you know, a day after I was inducted, the Selector met me personally and told me I was a replacement and it was temporary unless I could prove myself. Since then, I was so determined to stay and I did all the research, all the networking I could. I knew all the Moderators, VIPs, and notorious people by name and case by the end of that probation of a week. On my first day, when I met them for the first time, I was open and willing to work with them. Some of them shook hands with me, but there was bastards like Terrance, Malt and what’s-his-name-again Glean? Glint? Glint. Who simply just stood there and refused to shake hands. They gave me this really dirty looks that even a pig could tell that they didn’t like me. Why? Because they didn’t like my style? We’ve only been introduced for 30seconds! Because of something I said? I’ve only introduced myself!

Else: Well, distrust just happens, there’s no why? Your frequencies don’t match.

Ookame: I can’t recall who asked them why they didn’t want to shake hands, but I remember very strongly Malt said, “He won’t last for 3 months, why bother?” I was insulted but Glint chipped in saying I was too different from them. I think it was Hatch who asked if it was because I was Asian. “It’s about his race isn’t it? It’s because he’s Asian.” They didn’t answer, but that was enough to draw the lines. The old leader, Overture didn’t say a thing. Can you believe it!

Else: Well, you were equally bad too when Nii when she came.

Ookame: I didn’t mention it to the Selector because I didn’t want to seem weak but I slaved my time off for the following months. I had no mentors; some of them were nice enough to tip me here and there but no one was really watching out for me. I sought backing from the clubs based in Asia and their managers who were mostly Asians as well. I had a feeling there were more inclined to trust me but that wasn’t true. I was new and I didn’t have much say---if any--- in the Moderators so I didn’t prove much of a use to them and I couldn’t bend rules without getting disciplined. I had to work REALLY REALLY hard to get my backers, and to think they weren’t even Moderators, just managers and hosts! (laughs) My lucky break came when Tanizaki, the then manager of Genji Club had complaints and bills from geisha houses sent to him about his hosts. The original Moderator in charge was hopeless so I jumped the gun and offered to help. It wasn’t a very easy case but I was on home ground and when I closed it 11days from the 3months, he was more than happy to give me credit. Word got underway and you now how it is. (laughs) They couldn’t say I hadn’t proven myself because I took over and completed a case one of them couldn’t do. They l said I was lucky but they were in denial that they guessed wrong. In a way, being the only Asian helped because the Asian managers and hosts immediately identified with me. Of course, there were quite a few of them who maintained their ties with the other Moderators but I was roped in to protect their interests too. I challenged many of the detainment and arrest cases made by the old Moderators and I’ll tell you, they HATED me. They couldn’t beat me up so they started calling me names, elbowing me in the ribs and stomach, basically ostracizing me. It was hell, Else. (sobs) but what was it compared to what I had gone through? I had already been hardened before, I could just do it again. You know, sometimes I think I was tricked to open up during some periods of my life and then forced to hardened up again. It was so frustrating, so unbearable! You want to be change but you can’t! You simply can’t! (cries)

Else: You have a choice to be a wonderful person in the working world or a wonderful person in real life.

Ookame: Exactly. (cries) Sometimes I think I ‘m not supposed to be a geisha but I feel like one. (cries) I use to think of throwing in the towel, like I was a highly stretched rubber band waiting to snap. But my hatred, my desires, my fight for survival were too much; I simply couldn’t just die like that! When I met Oshima again, he drove me into overdrive mode. I was only surviving; he told me to get revenge! He also told me that there was a samurai saying that in a duel, in order to win, you had to be prepared to die in order to live. The warrior who was more willing to die would live. Such was the principle that guided him to induct me in. If I hadn’t told him I wanted to die, he would have brought me in as a Head hunter.


Yep, that's where I stopped typing. What do you guys think?

it's sooooooooooo long that i kinda stop after your 2nd post...

I just decided to start reading this, and I like it a lot. ;D